Just post something already!

[lnr]

Keep meaning to do a proper catch up post on the last 3 months (eek) but the desire to do it "properly" means it hasn't happened. Anyway since January:

• Me: Depression is mostly under control I think, but still taking the meds. Loving my current haircut and actually using straighteners when I dry it keeps it nice even when it only gets washed two or three times a week. I may be turning into a girl ;). I'm getting back into reading books again on a regular basis and have worked my way through a Pratchett, a Stephen King and an entire box set of the novels True Blood is based on. Mike and I are still enjoying our LoveFilm by post subscription, and it's cheaper now we dumped the Amazon Prime because we're no longer paying for the streaming content we never used anyway. We've caught up with season 4 of The Walking Dead and season 4 of True Blood recently, and enjoyed both. Perhaps something a bit less gruesome next?
• Matthew: is two! How did that happen? He's going through phases of being inexplicably upset or grumpy, and has a bit of a habit of closing one eye or looking a bit cross-eyed when concentrating, which we're getting the GP to look into, but in general he's good fun a lot of the time, and increasingly chatty. We didn't throw him a birthday party but did make a cake, and he enjoyed blowing out candles and lots of presents. We did have a joint party with our NCT group, and have been celebrating with some of his other friends as they all turn 2 too. A few of them now have younger brothers or sisters
• Family: We had a lovely post-Christmas visit to one set of Grandparents in Lydney in late January, and had great fun running round bits of the Forest. We also had a fab long weekend visiting Granny and Grandad in Mirfield, with trips out to Lotherton Hall with his cousins (and their cousins) and to Wentworth Castle. He's also had Easter hols trips to Anglesey Abbey and Wimpole Hall with his childminder, which he's really enjoyed. Just need to catch up with Pete and Val and Emily some time soon. Emily at least we know we'll see in June as we're looking forward to 40th wedding anniversary celebrations for mum and dad in Italy.
• Work: work's going pretty well actually, getting stuff done, keeping on top of queries, and some new projects to try get my teeth in when I've got a spare moment. We'll ignore the politics of the internal review process, the ridiculous way they're treating our technicians in terms of work space during a building project, and the mild worries about people retiring and not being adequately replaced as Not My Problem. I've also decided being Data Protection Officer is Not My Problem too - especially if they can't get round to putting it on any other footing than casually asking me if I can do it.
• UCU/USS: The Union officially accepted a pensions offer, which has now gone to a member consultation process. So it's possible something could change but highly likely that the end of our final salary scheme is in sight for next April, and though the career average scheme that replaces it will be an improvement on the existing career average scheme for newer members it's still not the result we were hoping for in terms of lots of the details. And the union itself is split over how the whole thing was handled and I'm somewhat disillusioned with the whole thing, and fed up of special sector conferences being called to make decisions more "democratic" than an all-member ballot, especially when they are called in Manchester. I'm considering stepping down from the local committee as I don't think the stress and responsibility is doing my mental health much good at the moment.

A bit random, and I'm sure I've left stuff out. Here's a big bunch of pics, so I've made them quite small, and you can click through if you want to see them bigger.

Comments

[pentamer.livejournal.com]

I'm pleased things are at least a bit stable for you now. Have you been to the sculpture trail in the forest near Coleford? Sadly the sculptures are deteriorating a bit these days, according to the webternet. Matthew looks like he's having a great time. Take care: you're someone I really look up to.

[lnr]

Gosh, that made me well up a little bit when I read the email notification yesterday, but in a good way. I haven't done the trail itself, but I've seen some of the sculptures both in the past and on our trip in January - notably the giant chair made of logs - which is indeed looking a bit the worse for wear. Matthew was more impressed by a) the Gruffalo trail and b) big sticks and c) dogs.

Admittedly the photos I tend to share (and indeed take) are when he's having fun rather than grumpy, but there do seem to be quite a lot so he must be OK :)

[pentamer.livejournal.com]

E is into Gruffalo, sticks, and dogs as well. We go to Thetford lots, just renewed our yearly pass. He seems to spend his time between forests and cathedrals at the moment!

I understand re the photos: all the ones we post are of E being lovely, but a couple of nights I've actually ended up with ringing in my ears from his screaming! It's great to see you all constructing good: it's what it's all about, after all! :-)

[1ngi.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry - I hadn't appreciated that you were having to deal with depression. I'm glad life is full of lovely stuffs. It's been lovely watching you both do the parently things via the medium of internets - Matthew seems a v happy kid :)

[lnr]

It's definitely a mild case I think - there are days I'm sure I'm OK, and days when a pot hole can make me burst into tears of frustration. I'm glad you enjoy the updates anyway - he's a lovely lad, I just don't cope very well when he's not happy, which is possibly something counselling or CBT might help with actually.

[1ngi.livejournal.com]

My nephew is very much a sunshine and showers kid (bit like me really) and my sister has had many tears of frustration over the years dealing with his wilful nature (Will by name...) but he is own person and knows he is loved to the core of his soul. I'm even amazed when my sister, in the middle of toys being flung and stropps being had, will in her fury, still say "I am very cross with you now [remonstrate, remonstrate] I still love you but you must [never do this again, behave behave]".

It think this is one of those amazing things - when kids *know* that they are loved, and never have any doubt on that front, they are practically indistructable. You clearly love Matthew - and he'll know that deep inside even though he's too young to articulate such concepts. Like any kid he'll push you as far as he can go and he'll do it all again tmrw.

You do NOT to be a perfect mum - you just have to be a loving mum. And it is clear, *even from this distance*, that you are xxx

[glittertigger]

Thanks for the update and it's good to hear things are mostly going well :)

[addison16.livejournal.com]

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