Not useless

[lnr]

Today I have geeked, painted bits of wardrobe, cleaned brushes and rollers, geeked some more including teaching myself how to write a CD-R of something for a friend, given wardrobe bits a second coat, washed brush again. Now I guess I should find some lunch.

Comments

[aldabra]

You're doing way better now you're not at work, aren't you?

Keep thinking I need that option, just before my head kicks in and reminds me I'm not at work already... 8-)

[lnr]

I'd say still very much up and down. I can't quite work out how it's got to Friday this week. Today's definitely been better. And the fect I even made it out yesterday was a good sign, especially after having spent most of the day in bed feeling useless. Days like today I wonder if there's anything wrong with me at all.

[juggzy.livejournal.com]

I think that a lot of it is to do with expectations. Most of life is a fairly monochrome grind; that doesn't mean it has to be depressing. But, if you are expecting bells and whistles and fireworks, that happens only rarely. I think one of the things that helps me out of depression is a joy in the small things - generating nonsense with friends, silly but funny remarks on various interweb forums, Footballer's Wives ... to see the joy in the small things, not to be always comparing the small things with the big things that I don't have.

Removing work removes the anxiety. You now have the time to rediscover the joy in the small things.

So, this is just a guess. And I'm probably wrong. But you are up and down because you get joy out of big small things, but haven't relearnt the joy in the small small things yet, like being able to stay in bed until two o'clock, or whatever.

[marnameow.livejournal.com]

You're never useless!

Coming London-wards for party goodness tomorrow?

[lnr]

Nod. See you there :-)