(not) in her shoes

[lnr]

I'd like to draw everyone's attention to "In her shoes - The Women of the Eighth". Who can be found on Twitter as @InHerIrishShoes and on Facebook as @RepealTheEighth. I've been reading their stories, and I've found I want to share my own.

I am Irish, but I am not in her shoes.

My dad is from Larne, but when my parents got pregnant at age 18, out of wedlock, it was in England. They could have chosen an abortion, but did not. They are not in her shoes.

When I got pregnant as a student it was in Oxford, I was retaking my final year, having failed the year before, and in a relationship which was being held together by the fear of suicide. But I was in England, and the wonderful NHS could help me with a termination (medical, as a day case - it was before they would let you go home after taking the pills). Here two doctors must agree that to continue the pregnancy would cause more harm to the mother than to terminate it would - but this is almost a formality. I was not in her shoes.

Nearly 20 years later, I was pregnant again, with a much wanted baby. I was lucky, and had a healthy pregnancy with no complications, and a straightforward birth, and I now have a lovely 5 year old boy. But going through that has only cemented in my mind just how *awful* it must be to be forced to go through this for a pregnancy you do not want, with no option but to do so. It made me more pro-choice than ever. And if anything had gone wrong, I know my care would have been foremost. I am not in her shoes.

I salute you all, from over the water, and I pray to all gods that I don't even believe in that you win, and that once you have won we can win the same argument for the women of Northern Ireland too. So that no-one else ever has to be in her shoes.

Comments

[fanf]

Beautifully written!

Fingers crossed for Friday, I really hope the yes voters turn out

[lnr]

Thank you!

[bookwormsarah]

I am currently pregnant and it definitely has made me even more pro-choice (and I’m having a relatively easy time of it so far). Because this was so much wanted, the changes in my body are exciting rather than a threat. What must it be like to be forced into this position? You put it beautifully.

[juliet]

The first protest L went to (aged 4 weeks; he pretty much slept through the whole thing, in the sling) was a pro-choice one. Every baby should be a wanted baby.

Hoping so hard for Friday. And then, as you say, for fixing this in NI as well; it is wholly appalling that abortion is still illegal there.